Mommy diary #3

Dear diary,

My baby had his birthday photoshoot today! Im so excited 😊

He soo wasn’t into it towards the end but got some cute pictures for us. He’s growing up and I still remember the day I went into labour and gave birth to him.

Its bittersweet

Bitter because he’s growing up faster than I imagine.

Sweet because I can’t want to have more adventures and see the wonder young man he’s becoming.

Is it me or time is speeding up? A day feel like 18 hours now. Maybe because I get exhausted and crash(go to bed) pretty early now😁.

Talk to you later.

Love,

An exhausted mom.

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Social media craze generation

I was a social media addict.

Every free time I had, I was on social media. MSN was what was in back in the day then I got into Facebook. After the Facebook thrill died down for me I got into Instagram and Twitter.

After a few years on Instagram I was hooked.

When I was bored, I’ll check it out.

Eating, I’ll be on it as well.

Before going to bed, scrolling my life away.

My mom pointed it out to me that I have an addiction but like all addicts at first, comes denial.

I was convinced that if I wanted to stay off I could. The thing is, I was feeling depressed and wishing I had this and that. It’s nice to keep up with people you look up to but if you bring low self esteem into play; that’s a bad combo.

I wanted more and more and more. I could of bought something but if I see something else online I wanted that also.

I got to the point where I was just fantasizing about having a different life than my own. I wasn’t even appreciating the things that I had, I just wanted what they had.

So blinded I let all the “fun” they were having to make me feel like I’m pathetic.

One day, I’ve decided it was enough. I realized that no one life is perfect and I’m just lusting at the good times people posting online. I wanted the good times of their life not realizing that no one is going to post about the hard times.

I realized that my life is more than scrolling through pictures and seeing how much likes I got.

I heard a voice told me to stay off social media for a week. I did and it was the most peaceful period of my life. The “need” for seeing what everyone was up to was gone. I was focusing on me and who I love and what I love. I’ve learned so many things over that period of time and the depression that came from wanting other people’s lives.

Currently Instagram app is deleted and I only go on other social media platform here and there. Just like if you have a drug addict, the sustains needs to be thrown away in order to get better.

If you need anyone to talk to feel free to email me at mydiary@writeme.com

The importance of Repentance

This is a topic that needs to be heard but isn’t talked about much because of the response it gets.

How important repentance is.

Whenever the topic comes up the first thing comes in people’s minds are “Oh this person is gonna judge me and say we going to hell”

Well I’m here to say that thats not the approach I’m going with this. I did things in my life, I was no saint.

I’ve lied, commited sexual immortality , cursed, lust, you name it. If it was left for my works, my destination was hell. Thankfully God sent His only son to die on the cross so I can be saved. His grace is the reason we have a chance for we aren’t worthy.

The first step is not to stop sinning then turn to God because we are too weak. If we try to do things from our own will especially addictions, we WILL fail.

You need to cry out to God with all your heart and tell Him you want to change and mean it.

Short stort:

I was lost in sin, I knew about God but I still did the things I use to do. After a while I started to feel guilty about the things so I decided I need to stop. I tried to do it my way using my will power and not asking God to help me.

I failed miserably.

After the things build up over years and years I couldn’t take it and I cried out to God because I wanted to be set free.

When I tell you that I felt a indescribable peace, I’m not exaggerating. The weight was lifted off of my shoulder and the urge of sin was gone. Temptation arise and I fallen short but I quickly repented and felt the love surround me.

The thing about talking about repentance is not to make people feel like they’re more than others. Its to have a close relationship with God and to please Him. Its for people to know that things need to change. All God wants from us is our heart, even the broken hearted. We tried it our way and we still have a hole in our heart that only God can fill.

The bible says in John 14:15 if you love Jesus you will follow His commandments. Yes God is love but He’s also a God of judgement.

The biggest lies the devil can plant in your head is that you’ve done too much to be saved and that we don’t need to repent.

God choose Paul (who killed Christians before) to become an Apostle.

David was a man of God but fell into sin but lusting, commit adultery and murder. God forgave him.

Your sin is not too big for God.

Your addiction is not too big for God.

Your circumstance is not too big for God.

Turn to Him with all your heart and He’ll do the cleaning up.

If you need someone to talk to email me at: mydiary@writeme.com

Mommy diary #2

Dear Diary,

Today it truly hit me that my baby is growing up. I knew he was growing up but I went down memory lane and looked at old pictures and my eyes started to water.

Every moment matter.

One day that little baby I cuddled to bed and kissed goodnight every night is going to go out in the real world. Out of my nest.

I know I’m thinking far ahead but time is going so fast. I still remember the day he was born, now he’s running about.

Gonna make the most of it and be the best mom I can be.

I’ll talk to you soon.

Love,

Mom that is holding back tears.